I gave my friends free rein of my Tinder the other night, and they came across a pretty decent looking guy who they thought I would be a good match with. I looked at the guy’s picture – NO NO NO! A previous match, that I had already been on a date with, reappeared on my screen. This guy is a perfect example of being fooled by online dating.
A couple months ago, this match asked me to go on a walk around Spring Lake with him, thus dubbing him Spring Lake Dude. As soon as he started talking I wanted out. He wasn’t cute and nerdy geek, he was a real geek. He tried playing hide-and-seek without telling me what he was doing, told me he was learning to pole-vault with broomsticks,wore unflattering jeans, and told adolescent jokes. His prime joke was “Have you seen the movie Constipated?” My response was “um…no”. The punchline, “That’s because it hasn’t come out yet!”. I was so embarrassed for him, I asked him if he stole that off a 12 year old boy. Apparently he was really proud of his joke and I crushed his dreams. Whatever, sometimes you have to be cold-hearted when it comes to dating.
For the rest of our walk, I kept thinking of ways to let this guy down easy without breaking what appeared to be a very fragile heart. As I was dropping him off at his car, HE broke up with me! He just “couldn’t see it working out”. How embarassing. I got dumped by a guy who I was ashamed to be on a date with.
Spring Lake Dude is a prime example of an online “hottie” who turns out to be not nearly as cool or attractive as his profile. Watch out, kids.
XO Sugar Kitten
